Words of Wisdom January 2, 2012

These are some quotes that got me through a hard day today. Thought I’d share.

“We must be willing to let go of the life we have planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us.”

“Wake up every morning with the thought that something wonderful is about to happen.”

“You can never cross the ocean unless you have the courage to lose sight of the shore.”

“Happy girls are the prettiest.”

“Sometimes God doesn’t give you what you want, not because you don’t deserve it, but because you deserve so much more.”

“My life may not be going the way I planned, but it is going EXACTLY the way God planned it.”

“The Lord will fight for you and you need only to be still.” Exodus 14:14

“Someone will always be prettier, someone will always be smarter, someone will always be younger, but they will NEVER be you.”

You Are Unique January 2, 2012

“Someone will always be prettier, someone will always be smarter, someone will always be younger, but they will NEVER be YOU.”

I came across this quote today and it made me think, a lot. Especially as a female, I feel like we always are thinking of something that is wrong, or something that is wrong with us. Life can be going at a million miles an hour, and yet we still have time to realize our flaws or what went wrong that day. I feel like that is something that the Lord is going to change in many hearts this year. The Lord has created us all for so many better, and more important things. The mindsets of so many are corrupted, but the Lord has the power to change them. So many words have been spoken over this next year, and revival is coming. Revival is coming and it starts in us. It starts from within a person’s heart and mind.

Today at church a lady told me that she was praying for me and saw a picture of a daisy in full bloom. She said that she felt the Lord was going to restore joy in me this year. At first, I thought “what is she talking about? I’m perfectly happy and content.” But when I sat down and thought about it when I came home, it made perfect sense. I have a great life, and am, by no means depressed, but for the past couple of months I just haven’t been happy. Sure fun things have been going on, and I’ve had good times with some amazing people, but I just haven’t been satisfied. And that’s when the Lord told me He loved me. He told me I’m worth it just because I’m me.

Everyone needs to hear that. So here it is. The Lord LOVES you. You’re worth it because He says you are. You don’t have to do anything to be more beautiful or dignified or eligible to receive every part of Him and His presence. Joy is something the Lord loves. It’s something He wants all of us to be swimming in, and its here. All we have to do is open up our hands and receive it. So, if you’re feeling like there’s always someone better than you, always someone who is one step ahead or doing something better than you can, know that the Lord finds so much happiness in your uniqueness. He finds JOY in you, and He wants you to find that joy in Him. He will fight for you, and defend you when it’s all crashing in, or rejoice and dance with you when His joy and revival fills your heart.

“The Lord will fight for you and you need only to be still.” Exodus 14:14

Decisions, Who am I supposed to be? and God’s answer December 30, 2011

Why are there so many decisions in life? 

Why are the choices so different and the outcomes unkown?

Why does it all involve taking a chance, and knowing how hard it’ll be continuing to trust the Lord?

Because it’s all a part of His big, amazing, important plan for all of our lives. I know I’m supposed to lead worship for the rest of my life. Things have happened that have tested me in that area, but the Lord continues to put music back into my life. I haven’t told many people the whole story. In fact, I could probably count the number of times I’ve told this on two hands, but I auditioned for American Idol this past summer and the outcome was something totally different than I was expecting.

I’m not the type of person to crave attention or be the outgoing one in a crowd. I’m not the type of person that is always dreaming for big things and shooting for the stars in everyday life, but the Lord changed that this past summer. I went to Disney World with my chorus last April and had the opportunity to compete in their American Idol Experience. It has all the elements as the real one, and the winner of the finale gets a “dream ticket” to go to the front of the line at the real auditions for the next upcoming season. If you haven’t heard this story before you can probably tell where this is going…I made it past the first round, to the finale, and came in….second place. The lady who won was in her 60s with grandchildren and obviously couldn’t use the ticket, but she had 1 year to give it to anyone she wanted to. So as I was walking away to go leave to park and eat dinner with all of my friends, my phone (which had been on low battery almost ALL day and I had no idea how it was still on) started to ring while I was holding it. If my phone had been in my bag I wouldn’t have felt or heard it. I was holding it at just the right time, because the producer of the show called me and told me that Debbie, the lady who had won the ticket, wanted to give it to me. So with lots of screams and running friends, my whole group of about 80, made their way to the back of the building so I could go get it.

    That was the start of something that I thought was going to be a huge, life changing experience. It definitely was, but not in the way I was expecting it to be. When school had ended for the summer I started picking out my song and waited for the call to tell me the ticket had been transferred into my name. Both were done and I registered it and had my spot to go audition in Charleston, SC. I told everyone, so set deep down in  my heart that this was God’s plan. I was going to be on American Idol. Talking about it now makes me feel so stupid to have believed that, but I was just dreaming. I was dreaming about the love and passion for the thing that the Lord has placed so heavily in my heart, music. It was finally the week before and I had started to feel sick after getting home from vacation, but thought nothing of it, until it started to get worse and 2 days before I was supposed to leave for Charleston I had lost my voice and had a terrible cold. The audition came, I got up at 3:30 in the morning on July 22, 2011, and I went and did my best. I had more people than I could count praying for me, praying that my voice would come back and God’s will would be done with my audition, and after I was told “sorry, maybe next time, thanks for coming, you can go through that door and find your mom” I realized that it was. It took me a few months to realize what exactly His will was for that, but I knew all along whatever the outcome, His plan would be the plan that would dominate mine, and I would grow stronger because of it.

     To this day, I still wonder why I decided to wait until after I graduated to audition and still got that ticket at Disney. I still wonder why I had to get sick and lose my voice days before, or why it all even happened. Why get so excited about something I’ve always dreamed of doing and be crushed in the end? Why did I have to be the one that had to go tell everyone waiting to hear the news that I didn’t make it? Why did I have to be the one to hear all the “I’m sorry”s and “You would have made it if I were the judge”s or “They don’t know what they’re missing out on”s?? Why did I have to be THAT one?  And I finally realized a few weeks ago that it was because the Lord has a plan bigger than me.  It’s bigger than what I want. It’s bigger than what I think, but it includes me.

    The Lord knows the desires of my heart. He let me experience them, but the way that I did wasn’t the way He had planned for me to for the rest of my life.  A few months ago I thought I was supposed to go to Clemson. I absolutely fell in love, and thought that that was where the Lord wanted me to be, but I was wrong. I got accepted to Anderson University about 3-4 weeks ago and everything began to click and fall into place. I’ve been offered scholarships without even applying for them. I’ve been accepted to a school where I can major in being a worship leader, and I have finally realized that His plan for me wasn’t to be someone famous, or known for reasons other than Him being the main focus in my life. Yeah, being on American Idol would have been cool, but if that happened I wouldn’t be leading worship for my youth group right now. I would have never had that opportunity to grow in something I love and fall even more in love with it as time goes on. I wouldn’t have made the strong friendships I’ve developed over the last few months or grown closer to Him and fallen deeper in love.

I am by no means the perfect Christian.

I do no have all the answers.

I do not know how to be the perfect worship leader, sister, daughter, friend, or follower of Christ, but I’m learning everyday. And while I learn I’m giving Him all the credit and all the praise. I’m chosing to put Him first above everything else and the rest will follow. I’m learning that He really is all I need and that if I had nothing else He would be enough and far more than that.  I’m learning that my story can help others. So to anyone who is ready this, remember the following:

Dream big, because the Lord knows the desires of your heart

Even when it’s hard, or closer to impossible, put God first

Exalt and praise Him even when you don’t feel like it, because He deserves it

Know how much He loves you. You are His favorite.

And finally, have fun. Do things that make you happy because the Lord’s not serious. He wants to laugh with you (and maybe sometimes at  you)

 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NFN2E_TeGno  <– I have no idea why this isn’t showing up as a video, but you should click on it

The Bench October 5, 2011

This post is exactly about what the title is. The bench. Well, to be more specific it’s about the bench on the playground at my work. Up until the middle of last week it was in the shade off to the edge making it difficult to see the kids when we needed to. I walked outside with my children last week and the bench was gone. It wasn’t in the shade anymore, it was in the sun, in the middle of the playground, in a place where all the kids would be visible. And at first I was extremely mad that I had to sit in the hot sun rather than the shade while being outside, but then I realized it wasn’t about me.  I wouldn’t be able to see what I needed to with the bench where it used to be. I know you’re thinking that I’m writing this blog about a bench on a random playground and you could care less, but there’s so much more to it. The bench was put where it was for a reason, and yesterday when I was watching my kids play at recess, I saw something that really hit me hard.  My boys LOVE to play football, and it’s absolutely adorable to watch because they act like they are a real team. One of my boy that we seem to have the most problems with during homework or quiet time was the one actually trying to make the game run smoother. He was going from boy to boy on his team and encouraging them and telling them how to run the play. As I watched him go from boy to boy it really made me think about how the Lord acts the same way. When we’re confused or needing direction and we are seeking  and relying on Him, He comes and guides us in the right direction.

Proverbs 3:6
in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight

I find myself looking at this verse often: “Psalm 37:4,7 Delight yourself also in the Lord, and He shall give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the Lord, trust also in Him, and He shall bring it to pass … Rest in the Lord, and wait patiently for Him.” The Lord has our best interests at heart, and sometimes we don’t even know what the desires of our hearts really are, but He does and He’s leading you on a path toward them when you put Him first.

Just like those boys playing football and taking direction from the one encouraging and leading, we’ll get nowhere by trying to do things on our own. Listening to the Lord’s voice is key and puts you in the right position. The outcome will be so much better when He’s #1 instead of #I’ll get to You when I have the time.

Exhaustion September 29, 2011

Finding time to get rest has been almost impossible. Falling asleep studying has become a normal and getting up early every morning is expected. So, today I decided to stay home and do absoultely nothing. I don’t feel bad at all for skipping school. I think I deserve it. And can I just say it feels so good to just sit here and think without worrying about what I have to do next

Peace In the Midst of Confusion September 27, 2011

I know the Lord has plans for me. I know He loves me and has my well being at heart, but what happens when I don’t hear His voice and everything seems to be going wrong? This season in my life has been going on for the past few weeks and there’s no sugar coated way to describe it. I feel burnt out, overwhelmed, stressed, dry, like my walk with the Lord isn’t bearing any fruit right now. I feel like everytime I ask for more, nothing comes. Like everytime one thing goes wrong, the next thing follows not far behind. What do I do when I don’t feel loved or specials? When I feel like the Lord is just watching me instead of walking with me? I’ve learned that the only thing to do is trust, trust in what I know is true instead of what I want to be true. Not everything shows progress from day one. It may take days, it may take week or months, but I’m willing to wait it out and seek the Lord throughout this. I’m willing to wait on Him and His PERFECT, kairos timing, because anyother way wouldn’t be the right way. The only thing to do is exalt Him for who He is no matter what the situation or how frustrated I am. The only thing to do is to dwell in His presence and know that it’s all I need.

I’m Here June 24, 2010

 

God’s presence is present tense. It’s right here. Right now. Not yesterday, last night, or Sunday when I get to church. Right now. And when you’re in His present tense presense, He’ll always be the same caring, compassionate, passionate Daddy…

 

 ”Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today, and forever.” Hebrews 13.8

Over the edge June 21, 2010

usually when you hear a voice in your head you think youve gone off the deep end. day 82

Originally uploaded by holly.skye

So many times I find myself wanting more. I just want to take a chance, and jump. Something seems to always be holding me back, and I don’t want that restriction anymore. I want to be free, crazy, myself.